Friday, February 16, 2007

Valentines, Election blah blah & Frustrations

Since we're all broke here, we opted to just cook pancit canton with matching hard boiled egg for our snacks yesterday. Add up the Pop Cola. lol. hehehe. A memorable Valentine's Day! I just spent the night watching t.v. as usual and slept earlier than my usual sleeping time. While waiting for the teleserye, I opted to watch news so as to keep myself updated with the latest happenings within the country. And I really have to blog on this issue. I felt bad about confirming the issue that our national boxing hero is indeed running for congressman this coming election. Imagine?!?!? What will happen to our country if it will be ran by actors and athletes?
I don't have much idea on politics and the government. I'm poor in Political Science. I find it boring honestly. Back in my college days, sometimes I haven't noticed that I'm already dozzing off in my polsci class. hehehe... :) I was just lucky enough my professor wasn't able to notice that I'm already in dreamland.
Going back to the topic, though I don't have much knowledge on politics, I can still say that being a senator and a congressman is not a joke. You have to have experience and knowledge about what you're getting into.
When asked why he wanted to run for congress, Pacquiao said that he just wants to help the Filipino people. He said that a lot of poor people needs his help. He can help in some other ways aside from running for congress. My gosh!!! Ano ba???? I'm so sorry I'm just pissed off. He wasn't able to finish school and he's still got more fights to win. One can never serve two masters.
If I were him, I'll just concentrate with my current profession. And just run for a lower position within my hometown when time comes that I'll get tired of playing.
Well well well... That's life. I'm sorry but I'll just hope and pray that he (and even Richard Gomez) will not win this coming election. There are already a lot of garbage in the government. What will happen to our country? ¤sigh¤
Back to work :)

Two hours later after shouting out my heartaches on the current election issues, my officemate keeps on ranting on a certain conference that she really wanted to attend. But it's kind of too late because she needs a big amount of money for the said activity . She's really disapponted and frustrated about it that she brought out the idea of calling McDo for delivery. She keeps on insisting and I have no choice but to give in to her plea and sir Emman already agreed to her bad idea. Yeah as in bad. Huhuhuhu. I don't know how to start slimming down. I gained weight again. :( I am frustrated again. But it really feels good to eat. Hehehehe :) So here we are, happy because we're full, but a little bit down, because we have to wait for another 5 days for payday to come. We're all broke now, as in totally broke. Haay life...

Thursday, February 15, 2007

Happy Hearts Day Ü

It’s St. Valentine’s Day once again, and here I am, still single just like last year. Got no luck in relationships I guess. What I’ll be missing this special day is the dinner date, bar hopping and videoke galore with my college friendships ? I don’t have so many friends here in Durian City. My lagaw mate will be having a date with her friends from the SFC. Another office mate will be spending it with his girlfriend, I really sure he would. And our manager? I dunno what’s Ms. Vi’s plan but I don’t have any moolah now. I’m broke :( As in totally broke. I’m actually preparing for my superfriend’s arrival on Sunday. Yeah ;) Maebelle my baboy (we fondly call each other baboy, hehehe, terms of endearment), one of my high school barkada will be coming over for some audit work. I miss her so much. She’s my lagaw mate back at home. I wasn't able to spend time with her when I came home last month, I was busy with my fake (as in super fake!) love life while she on the other hand, had so many overtime work to render. I would like to make it up to her when she arrives here. I miss our shopping days. It's one of our ways to keep up with each other's lives aside from the usual tambay or sleepover at her place.For now, I'll just focus on my work. I'm not that loaded now. I even have a little time to blog. Valentines Day is not just for lovers. One online friend said that V-Day is an awareness day for all singles. Well, I'm guess he's right. Awareness that I'm alone on this special day for lovers. Got no one here even just my family. But I'm okay and I will be okay :) And V-Day is not only for lovers, mind you, it's for families and friendships. One way to keep ourselves bonded with our loved ones not only with our special someone but with our family and friends as well.Have a Happy Hearts Day everyone!Ü

Wednesday, February 14, 2007


Nothing much. I feel bloated. hehehe. When I'm depressed, it's either, i'll eat too much or i won't eat and just lock myself inside my room. But since I can't do the latter one because I have to report to the office everyday, I have to eat and eat just to make myself feel better. hahaha :)
I am always hungry. This has to stop or else, I'll gain more weight again.
I went out of the office twice this day. The manager told me to check our petty cash. I've checked it before lunch time but the account balance is still the same. And again checked it in the afternoon together with our driver (whew I'm glad he came back earlier from processing his health card, I hate taking the jeepney while I'm on my skirts), but still, same balance. Delayed and BPI? Ay? hehehe...
I hate it when I've got the chance to go out of the office. Going out would mean spending on things or food again. I just can't help it. hehehe... Bought some snacks before going back to the office. Eat again! :)
I am still hungry but I really feel fat now. Anyone can help me? :(

Tuesday, February 13, 2007

Freedom & Heartache

One week and 5 days from now, it will be my 7th month here in Davao City. Seven months of not having someone to scold me for coming home late at night, of fighting homesickness and depression and of dealing with different kinds of responsibilities not only in the office but also inside our company staffhouse.
Time passed by so fast, I never thought I would last this long. I used to think of leaving my job here so that I can go home and just find another company to work with. But it's easier said than done. It's too complicated and risky. I am a risk taker, I really know I am, that's why I'm here. But there are some things to weigh before just quitting my current position.
I just went home last month and it really cured my homesickness. Almost a week of mingling with friends and cousins and of course with my family. It felt good to be home but... yeah... BUT... hehehe... I'm no longer used to having someone to watch my every move and ask where in the world am i going again and with whom. I really have super protective aunts and uncles, add up my super paranoid mom and grandma. They still can't accept the fact that I'm way too old to be treated like a 16 year old girl. I love my mom and grandma so much. I know they're just concerned about me. Kasi naman, unica hija po ako. hehehehe :)
I am not like some of my friends who likes to party until early morning. I am not used to night outs. I seldom go out with friends to go bar hopping and videoke. I would just like to hang out at a friend's house and watch movies or just be bonded with them that sometimes we would forget that it's already way past bedtime and that I have to go through another long sermon the following day. wehehehe :)
Life is different here now. I may have the freedom to party all night and stay up late in some one else's house until the wee hours of the morning, but, I already had lots of them back home. And got less friends here compared at home. I just had one sleep over at a friend's house, my former high school batchmate Ella, when another highschool batchmate came to visit Davao for some audit work. It feels great to be free. But along with this so-called freedom, comes a big responsibility.
I am responsible for myself now. That's why I should be extra careful so as not to worry my family at home. I have to be wiser in decision making and I should know how to control my expenses. And not only that, I should take good care of my work.
Going home means sacrificing my freedom... hehehe :) and I'm not yet ready for it. For now, I just have to do my work, give my best shot in every task designated to me by our big boss. I know it will be paid off, maybe not now, but someday. Patience ;)
I've been through a lot for the past six months. Everyday I'm learning. Everyday I'm trying to cope with changes. Everyday I'm dealing with unique situations. And everyday, since last, last week, I'm still dealing with my heartache. This has to end, but it can't be forced :(
Someday, someone's gonna love me The way, i wanted you to need me Someday, someone's gonna take your place One day I'll forget about you You'll see, i won't even miss you Someday, someday
haaaay what a day....

Thursday, February 08, 2007

Charge to experience...

I feel a lot better now. But there would be times when I’m all alone in my room (especially during night time) and I really can’t help but contemplate on what happened last week. I really don’t consider it as a major heartbreak but still, I feel devastated. I’m always being fooled. Haha! I am indeed vulnerable. It has been proven and tested so many times in my 23 years of existence. I am not that hard to convince. I easily give my trust to persons I just met or knew. It’s my number one sickness. Tsk tsk tsk…
I’ve spent more than I should have last week L Kawawa ang savings ko… Buying stuffs and eating has been my diversion from depression. It’s either spending on food, stuff and going on salons or locking myself in a room and just let my tears wash away all the aches and frustrations that I’ve felt.
Love nga naman. Hahaha =)A four letter word that could either make or break our being. Love is not love if there’s no pain, that’s what they say. But if someone loves you, he/she would never do things that could hurt you. On the contrary, we are human and we are all susceptible to temptations. But (again, hehehe) according to Greg Behrendt, one of the authors of He’s Just Not That Into You (yeah you’re right, I’ve purchased a copy of his book just to make myself feel better), there are no excuses for cheating. Cheating is cheating. Cheating is hard only on the first try. It will make us feel guilty. But after that first attempt, it would be easier to cheat again. And someone who is into you will never do things that will make you feel bad, like cheating and lying.
Charge to experience. I keep on repeating this lines everytime I feel bad about what happened. Nagpakatanga na naman ako sa ngalan ng pag-ibig. I’m glad that I was able to handle the situation compared to my previous heartbreaks. I can say I’ve learned from the best teacher ever, syempre, EXPERIENCE. That’s why, CHARGE TO EXPERIENCE na lng lahat. Atleast, I became a part of his life. A very SIGNIFICANT part of his life. Still, I love him despite of his dishonesty. Despite of his imperfections. But I know that he will never be mine and this is one of the realities that are so damn hard to accept. He will never be mine. Someone else owns him. And I hope someday, he’ll find happiness in the arms of that person. And that he will never repeat whatever deceitfulness he has done to me to that person who truly loves him.
Thank you for making me stronger (you know who you are). J I know everything happens for a reason. I’ve learned so much from you. Thank you for accepting your fault. Time will heal the pain. The pain will make me stronger and wiser, not in only in love but in all aspect of my life.
Wohooo.. so sentimental! Hopeless romantic me… hehehehe =)
Before I end this mushy post of mine, I would like to share another line from Greg Behrendt’s He’s Just Not That Into You.

Monday, February 05, 2007

Not that into me...

Yeah! He's just not that into me... I really believe that love cures commitment-phobia... He's just not that into me... woohoooÜ

I will be ok, I know I will...


I'll get over it... maybe not now, but eventually, I'lL GET OVER IT!

I'll be happy with or without him...


It still hurts like hell..


But I've learned a lot from this heart-wrenching experience...

I'm still blessed... I know I am loved by God...

I just have to learn the hard way...